When you are facing problems with your home loan and foreclosure is starting to look like a real possibility, the enemy isn’t the bank. It’s your emotional state. If you are like most people you are filled with a swirl of emotions and bewildered about how you allowed your mortgage to get so out of control. You can’t believe how quickly the economy, the housing market and your finances took a turn for the worse. You may even be frozen in place and incapable of sorting through your options in any meaningful way. You may feel overwhelmed by fear, anger, guilt and an overriding sense of helplessness.

Many people, especially men like to get wrapped up in anger. Anger is convenient emotional cover for all the other emotions you are feeling. Many people find it inappropriate or embarrassing to express any emotion but anger. People like to find refuge in the dead end of anger. Anger is manly while other emotions make you feel weak. Anger lets you off the hook. It externalizes the causes and makes you the victim not the creator of your problems. Most people in your situation ride the futility of their emotions right to the courthouse steps. By doing this they lose control over the entire process and become just another foreclosure statistic. You are reading this book so you are probably in the small minority of people who are willing to take a good hard look at your situation and take the appropriate steps to minimize the potential downside of the foreclosure process.

If you feel emotionally frozen we need to talk you off that ledge first so that you can effectively take control of your mortgage problems. The best way to do that is to take a look at the worst case scenario. If you accept the worst that could possibly happen, you will see that it really isn’t as bad as your imagination makes it. It is the unexamined fear that prevents you from acting effectively. Let’s take a look at the worst thing that can happen to you. By doing this you take away its ability to stop you from acting. You’ll also see that the absolute worst scenario is easily avoided if you can get past the emotional barriers.

In all my years of selling foreclosures for banks I have only witnessed one case where the worst case scenario actually came true. This is the story of Drunk Jim. The neighbors called him Drunk Jim because there were two neighbors named Jim on this close knit street. This particular Jim was always drunk so the neighbors got in the habit of referring to him as Drunk Jim to avoid any confusion over which neighbor Jim they were referring to. Don’t get me wrong, all the neighbors liked Drunk Jim and he was an important part of the neighborhood. He was the type of person who would do anything to help a neighbor out…if he was sober at the time. Drunk Jim was a happy drunk. He was never violent or loud. He just wanted to be left alone to well, drink.

The first time I met Drunk Jim was after he lost his home on the court house steps to foreclosure. The bank took the home back and they assigned the listing to me. I had to do an occupancy check on the property to see if anyone was living there. I met with Drunk Jim and explained the situation. I told him that the bank now owned his home and they were going to offer him a cash for keys settlement. I told him that if he didn’t accept the cash for keys the bank would start eviction proceedings. I explained all of his options and told him where he could get free legal assistance. I explained that he had at least 3 months before the eviction would be enforced by the sheriff’s office. I told him that he could drag out the eviction proceedings by getting the free legal assistance. I told him about some local charities that would be able to help him to find a place to live. Drunk Jim’s only response was “but this is my home and I’ve got nowhere else to go”. I explained to Drunk Jim that if he did nothing the day would come when the sheriff’s deputies would show up to enforce the eviction. They would allow him 5 minutes to gather some belongings and would then escort him from the house. I tried to convince him to do something to avoid this unpleasant scenario but he was too emotionally frozen to do anything.

Drunk Jim's Stuff. Don't Let This Happen To You.

As the months passed I kept talking to Drunk Jim and tried to help him help himself but he refused to do anything but wait. Eviction day finally came and Drunk Jim was still in the house. The sheriff’s deputies escorted him from the house and he drove off abandoning all of his things. All of his personal property then became the property of the bank. I tracked down Drunk Jim’s sister a few days later and she rescued her brother’s personal effects. The rest of his things were unceremoniously hauled off by a trashout company. This is the absolute worst case scenario but you can see how easily avoidable this is. The first rule of foreclosures is not to be there when the sheriff shows up.

Don't Be Like Drunk Jim